101 Ways to get out of gym...

"Get up, get up, get busy to it; get up and move your body..." If you, like me, find it exceedingly difficult to motivate yourself to go to the gym every so often, I have found a possible answer: get yourself a personal trainer! You still have to drag yourself out into the freezing cold, but at least there is someone cheering you on as you get there.

Yes, the weather is decidedly offputting when contemplating the gym. I'd much rather snuggle up with the underfloor heating and visualise it instead. Don't they say you can do anything with the mind? Mmm...didn't get a positive response there. I pondered other options: braving road rage and going for a jog...all fair and well if the sun is shining and there's no wind freezing my brain...SEX!...a perfect option..um..(*darn*)...Or I could hit the town and boogie my body firm? Not a bad idea, I thought, then suddenly it all came back to me that the reason I need to go to gym in the first place was from all the late night boozing and munchies. I faced the stark, cold truth - my J-Lo boodie was not going to disappear by sitting on the couch, no matter how much I tried to convince myself. Mmm...I braved the blizzard and went to the gym.

How my luck changed that day! I met up with Angie. She's a Personal Trainer. I've often watched her cruising round the gym, giggling with clients . Can't be that bad if her clients are smiling! So I decided to give it a bash. Today was my first session.

Angie targeted my muscle groups that need most of the work (no brainer there!) and handed me some heavy objects and told me to "LUNGE"! Fooled me, you did, I thought as previous images of her giggling resurfaced. More like Private Angie now! But, work me she did. And I had a great time doing it! We laughed and chatted through the pain and the sweat and by the time I left, my muscles were pumped!

I am meeting her again tomorrow and I have realised, that I really am quite amped to get to the gym! Having a personal trainer has completely revamped my antagonism towards exercise. So this is my message to all of you who hate going to the gym - get a Personal Trainer - it really helps! Watch my boodie for more...!

Addiction theories

Addiction is a word that often conjures up thoughts of drugs or alcohol, yet it refers to the concept of being unable to live without something. This could be anything - coffeee, shopping, a fetish. If you spend time thinking about something to such a degree that it starts dominating your life, it could be an addiction. I can think of at least one addiction I have - crack! Before you gasp in horror (or longing!) - I'm talking about facebook! Someone coined a new nickname for this addictive site - so addictive it's like crack! "He's got crack!", "she's on crack!", " he needs to get crack!" etc.

Other addictions dominating my life - BLOGGING; Prison Break; CSI NY and possibly smoking (when I'm driving or on the computer or socialising)...still haven't fully accepted the latter as an addiction though - I'm working on it!

If you're looking for some release from your specific addiction, my advice: get help! Or keep yourself locked up; or run out of money so you just can't buy the substance - that always works well with me. If you're looking for a less aggressive approach, however, try crystals. Hematite is a useful stone for overcoming compulsions and addictions. This effective stone treats overeating, smoking and any form of indulgence and helps one come to terms with one's mistakes. It also dissolves negativity and prevents negative energies from entering the aura, restoring peace and harmony to the body. Hematite shouldn't be used where inflammation is present or for long periods of time.

So next time you feel that irresistible urge to get your fix, grab some hematite....you might need a lot of it! Talking of which, best I get some now because I'm on a blogging roll!

Day in the Country.

Just beyond the cacophonous chatter, I could hear a faint sound that made me nostalgic. I extricated myself from the thrilling discussion and tuned in to the scene far away.... Aah, a rooster! Nothing like a rooster at 4 in the morning to remind you of the pleasure of farm life. As a child, I used to go trout fishing with my family for holidays and every morning I would awake to the sound of the rooster, screeching his message that the day had begun. Well, at least that's what I thought the message was. It could've been something quite different, like: "If I don't get it now I'm going to throw you out of the pen, you CHICKEN!" At seven years old, my mind was still innocent. So as I sat among my friends today, the memories of my childhood flooded back and I felt a deep longing for those happy, carefree days.

A friend of mine has a farm in Muldersdrift, outside Johannesburg and a bunch of us congregated there for the day. After a pleasant drive through the sundrenched hills, I eventually found the farmhouse by heading towards the glint of cars - shining beacons showing me the way. I had to giggle at my friend's directions: 'the farm on the right with the trees'...I surveyed the surroundings - a contagion of trees dotted the landscape. Needless to say, I was not the only one who took a wrong turn!

I glanced around at my collection of friends. Friends, whom I have known for many years. I felt completely content in this happy environment. I could be anywhere with these people and still feel ecstatic. There's something about having a close circle of friends that warms the heart. Despite the distance and time that elapses, we always resume from whence we left off.

Time has been busy, I chuckled quietly to myself. Three new babies had arrived in the pack. Crawling and scrambling on small shaky legs, little lifeforms splashed the garden with colour. Mummies and Daddies taking cherubs for walks, pointing to trees and the birds and the bees! It doesn't seem so bad, I thought, enjoying the scene whilst reflecting on my adamantly single life. Comparing the parents to their little Mini-me's, I could see familiar expressions bursting through their small faces. It must be wonderful to witness the blooming of life. Moving on swiftly, I rejoined the discussion!

The day was spent with love and indulgence. A feast of festivities. The lunch was delicious, the gnattering was constant and we even squeezed in a few rounds of frisbee and 30 Seconds. To top it off, a delectable carrot cake to further sweeten the day.

As I was cruising home - the darkness winning the fight over light - I wallowed in the memories of the blissful day. Suddenly it occurred to me, upon reflection of such wonderful friends, that they were all reflections of me. These friends display all the qualities in life that I so desire and enjoy. Therein was my epiphany! What a day and what damn good friends I have. What a way to remind myself that all is good in Lisi Land!

Breast Cancer Stats...

One in 3 women will develop cancer in her lifetime. Breast cancer is the leading cancer in women. Each year breast cancer kills 500,000 people a year globally, and 1.2 million are diagnosed with it every year. One in 8 women will develop breast cancer in her lifetime. See link to test your risk of diseases. http://www.yourdiseaserisk.harvard.edu/english/

Choccie vs Goliath

I was racing out my driveway today when I screeched to a halt. I spotted a familiar black rump readying itself into stalk mode. I watched with interest as my undersized kitten commenced his attack on an unsuspecting Hadida! As most South Africans will know, the Hadida bird has taken over the suburbs in vast numbers. Not only are they completely complacent in suburban landscapes, they are also indifferent towards cats. My previous cats were terrified of them - electrified furballs, they would flee at the sight of a Hadida. Not this cat! Happily pecking out earthly delights, this Hadida was unpeturbed by Choccie's deathly poise. Suddenly without warning, my cat lurched himself towards the lazy bird and swiped it with his razor claws. In a flurry of wings and extracted feathers, the Hadida squawked and stumbled out of reach. Highly disappointed, Choccie glanced around to see who had witnessed his failed attempt. When he realised I'd observed his poor effort, he sauntered into a bush indignantly as if to show his irritation at my intrusion into his world! Later in the day, the neighbourhood watch told me that this is a common occurrence with my cat and that he has in fact killed at least one Hadida before! Clearly Choccie has developed a reputation among the locals. What a warrior! I have to marvel at his big b.... bravery!

Crystals for your Dreams...

Crystals were formed in the womb of the earth millions of years ago through the processes of water, wind and volcanic fire. They act as an amplifier of healing energy and send out certain vibrations (every object on this earth transmits a certain vibration) according to their properties. Placing a crystal under your pillow when you sleep will influence your dreams. Try Rose Quartz, as I did last night. Rose Quartz eases pain or tension, cuts or bruises and emotional distress such as fear, grief or anger. It keeps away nightmares and brings peace to the home. You can find crystals at most of the fleamarkets, which are generally cheaper than the shops like House of Isis. Happy Crystalising!

DJ Lilli

I dreamt it was my birthday AGAIN! It must be due to the multitude of Gemini's around me lately! 'I awoke to my Mum presenting me with the biggest dj deck I've ever seen, complete with flashing lights and monstrous vinyls. Two of the Chippendales carried the deck into my room (heehee) and I was ecstatic!' Clearly I've been hanging around dj's, decks and hot men lately! Next question is: do I want to start dj'ing?! Not a bad thought! Or am I just looking for a hot dj who can spin me around?! Mmm..the mind races..

Seal Killing in Namibia

Today signalled the beginning of my activism towards helping the beautiful creatures on our planet! I went to my first protest today! I am passionate about animals and have always been sensitive to the plight of creatures in distress, but I had never acted upon it. So when I was sent an email about the clubbing to death of pup seals in Namibia, my heart lurched and my soul cried out in anguish for these beautiful creatures. Hosted by Anastaysa from the wonderful vegan restaurant, Earth2 in Emmarentia, the protest was organised outside the Namibian embassy in Pretoria today, in the hope of putting an end to this senseless murder. The killing of innocent, baby seals will start on July 1st. This is the 2nd largest Seal Slaughter in the world, the commercial Seal Hunt in Canada, being the 1st. Baby seals and their nursing cows are rounded up on the beaches of Namibia and senselessly clubbed and stabbed to death. Namibian's pup quota is 85 000 seals for 165 days. The seals are rounded up and killed in the early hours of their nursing morning, afterwhich the sealers cover up the bloody evidence for the sweep of tourists visiting the beaches every day.
The protest was creatively inspired by a funeral procession. Various placards and fake seal pup coffins were distributed to the 30 protestors while a melancholic drumbeat accompanied the march around the Namibian Embassy. The commissioner fled as soon as he discovered the reason for the gathering. A couple of reporters took photographs and the scene was one of sombre compassion. It was a protest of calm, austere sincerity and I was honoured to be among people with such passion and care for our creatures. Well done Anastasya! I was so happy to be a part of this event and I will surely be doing more in the near future. Please see the link for more information on this desperate situation. http://www.animalrightsafrica.org/NEWS_Jun07_SealsNamibia.php

Bullshit banter!

"Rhubarb, chatter, gnatter, rhubarb...!!...giggle..??...nodding, prodding..." What the...? My mind thrust me into the throes of debate this morning as my head bubbled with philosophical notions. I intercepted the manic bantering with a pertinent question: How do I reason and understand my outer reality in relation to other people's realities? Mmm...I threw my contribution into the mix. When someone presents to me, what I determine as an abstract thought - for comic reasons perhaps or to contribute to the flow of bullshit determining a conversation - that has no definite grounding in a way that I could consider to be completely reasonable and possible in reality my logic understands this concept to be completely plausible. In other words, I will totally believe the presented joke or bullshit to be a reality and totally plausible to exist! This fantastical system of inner logic is partly due to my vivd imagination where anything is possible and everything that can be materialised into thought, exists. Unicorns exist, as do faeries as is a planet made of creme brulee where its inhabitants indulge in decadent delights and never increase in girth! To contexualise my complex thoughts, I recounted an instance where my fabulous logic performed its function: a friend of mine posted a conversation between three people on his blog, where they jested various philosophical ideas among themselves with comical effect. After reading this delightful banter, I was left wondering who these people were in relation to my friend and how come I'd never met them. I was so absorbed by the content of their discussion, that the possibility that these people did not even exist and were simply creations of my friend's colourful mind, did not even enter my head! It was only later through further information, that I came to realise it was all a wordplay. My logic had manifested complete plausibility that these characters really did exist and had actually been involved in active conversation. Giggling to myself, I came to self-realisation about how I make meaning from the world around me and that it's a purely instinctive reaction. I have a very open-minded logic where the system is formulated almost momentarily according to the information and stimulants provided to me at that time. Hmph! So...to end this mindful chapter, I ask myself, who's bullshit am I going to believe today?!

DNA activation

What a glorious day it is today..I'm feeling full of the joys of life. I'm resonating on a higher frequency than usual today and I had to question whether I did in fact have more than one cup of coffee or not - the answer is, no! I had to do a double-take at the unearthly vibrations emanating from my ghetto blaster...ah-ha! The source of my inspiration could be the high frequency DNA activation CD I use from time to time to raise my vibrational frequency. The alien sounds remind me of the theme music to 2001 Space Odyssey by Stanley Kubrick. It creates a feeling of infiniteness and I found my mind conjuring up images of faraway stars and galaxies...If you would like to learn more, log onto http://www.ActivateYourDNA.com

Extract from 'Shantaram' - Gregory David Roberts

He prepared the chillum, rocking from side to side and smiling absently. He never looked at us, but still it seemed to be the smile of a very close friend: indulgent, knowing, forgiving. He was standing and swaying so close to me that I could see each wiry strand in the forest of his brows. I heard the little gasps of his breathing. The rapid outward rushes of air sounded like wavelets on a steep shore.

Rediscovery of the World's Most Southerly Elephants

DNA analysis has revealed the existence of five previously unknown, female Knysna elephants in the southern Cape, South Africa. Thought by many to be doomed to extinction, with fears in recent years that only one Knysna elephant, an elderly female was still surviving, the findings of a population study conducted using fecal DNA has revealed that the Knysna elephants continue to survive, despite formidable odds. The decline of the Knysna elephants occurred over many decades due primarily to ivory hunting. In 1876 several hundred of these elephants were thought to exist, but under heavy pressure of ivory hunters were reduced to 20-30 individuals by 1908. In 1970 the Knysna elephant population was estimated at 11. In 1994 only one Knysna elephant was known to be still surviving, the elderly female. In 1994, in a experiment to boost numbers three young elephants from the Kruger National Park were introduced into the range of the elderly female. One of the young elephants died of stress related complications soon after release. The remaining two elephants joined up with the elderly female for only short periods before choosing to spend 80% of their time in mountainous fynbos habitat beyond the Knysna forest. In 1999 the two young elephants were recaptured and relocated to the Shamwari private reserve in the Eastern Cape. The Knysna elephants were then declared by some to be almost extinct. 'The Knysna elephant study identified that at least five females exist within the population, and two of the animals identified appear to be first-order relatives and that several others may be half-siblings. The results also suggest that the surviving Knysna elephants are closely related to the elephants of the Addo Elephant National Park' says Patterson. Since the completion of the study, there is evidence that a Knysna calf was born. Gareth Patterson, Knysna Elephant Project: gpatterson@xsinet.co.za

Birthday Girl

As the sun tickled me awake this morning, my thoughts scrambled themselves into place. Suddenly the realisation dawned on me - it's my birthday! Giggling to myself at the chaos that was to befall the people closest in my life all those years ago, I slapped myself with pride for getting to where I was today.
I have received gifts and love from around the world. Messages flooded in from far and near to celebrate this fateful day. My heart has pumped with a pulse of passion and I'm so honoured to know all of you in my life! Thank you all for shaping, colouring and fustrating my life! Cheers to you and to my wondrous existence!